Just to warn you, this was written over multiple days on microsoft word, so everything is mental. that's all.
Last Tuesday..... Or maybe I’ll start backwards instead because it’s fresher in my mind.
Monday. Today (or the day I am writing this..) I woke up at 7am and sadly got ready in time to go to colegio before 7:20. Damnit! I really didn’t want to go today. I need a mental health day. Things have been kinda on thin ice lately and I’m just skating around like a confused duck. Then in English class, because I was so thrilled by the lesson, I decided to doodle and counted the days I have been in Peru and the days I have left (which I haven’t done for a looooong time). Here’s a depressing fact. Today was my 83rd day in Peru. And I have exactly 83 days left for my exchange. I can’t believe how long I’ve been here and that every day now will be part of the countdown. Saddest countdown ever!! No wonder they tell you to go for the year program!! I’m shocked, depressed, and just wanna get the most out of every day I have left as I can. What if i’m not fluent before i leave? Im so confused and conflicted and happy and sad and grateful and six billion other things too. I’ve been sad nearly every day here but I’m going to be more sad to be leaving. More sad?? Sadder? What’s English.
No water again. As of Saturday. This is fun.. haha not. Then after colegio today, thankfully, there was cold water in the house, but only downstairs. So I took a bucket and filled it with cold water to carry up to the shower, where I enjoyed a cold, refreshing, bucket splash bath with the cut off end of a water bottle. Wow, I’ve realized my grammar is getting quite bad sometimes and either I’m too lazy to fix it or I actually can’t remember how to or figure it out. But I use thousands of run on sentences!! Sorry guys. Anyways. That was kinda funny actually. My improvised “shower.” I’m pretty used to cold water showers now but yeah. I was super lucky with my timing though because about 15minutes later the water was cut off completely, downstairs, cold or not! Still hasn’t returned. We can’t wash dishes, which is a big problem. I bought a bottle of water to brush my teeth.
Then around 6:30ish I met up with Mona at Plaza Mayor (i spell it wrong and differently every time. But that’s how it sounds. Mai-or) and we got in and out of three different taxis before finding one that actually went to our Plaza de Armas destination in el centro hahaha. We met up with all the other AFSers and paid a high price of 10 soles to see Harry Potter 7.1 in Spanish. We had hoped it was going to be in English with Spanish subtitles but...nope. Definitely the most confusing thing ever. I was kind of disappointed, but maybe it was from lack of understanding. I was doing pretty good for most of it but then we all got pretty bored with it and Johanna and I even fell asleep for un rato. Apparently in that two minutes I missed a lot of stuff and then afterwards I kinda stopped trying to keep up. Then when Harry’s face was all swollen and beat up looking Emily and I couldn’t stop laughing! Then the other actor said “Que te paso feo?” Hahahaha what happened to you ugly? XD Omg we just started laughing harder and harder and harder and I must have ruined 20min of the movie for other people in the theatre but I couldn’t help it. I even shed a few tears from laughing so hard! That never happens to me! Pretty sure I had a mental breakdown and it was some sort of way of releasing my pent up sadness and frustrations lately, through laughter and tears...because it really wasn’t funny at all. Emily and Mona and them only started laughing because I couldn’t stop! hahhaa. Y despues I just thought that everything was funny. And now I’m just mentally exhausted. Every little thing or thought or cancion just brings tears to my eyes. And I wish I could say why!! So hard not to start dangerous rants on here... I’m really good at those. But i don’t want problems to start or get worse. L
Sunday (today’s yesterday)
Yesterday was going to be my homework/study/violin and research/start application process for university day. But Nancy asked if I would accompany her to el centro for “un rato. A little bit.” and do my work later. Of course I said yes, to bond, even though I had no idea where we were going or why. Did not know that we were going to Sra Vicky’s house to have lunch and converse for 4.5 hours with her and her family! Then we finally had our requested AFS reunion half an hour later. Day gone, no work accomplished. BUT going to her house was a highlight of my week because it showed me the type of culture and values I love to see here. Their house is missing a floor, some walls and roof, lights, and a proper bathroom. The ground is dirt and there is a blanket for a door out the back. They are very poor but they are sooo rich in love and family and good spirits. They invited us for almuerzo and the time actually flew by talking to her, her husband and their two older daughters and little boy. Sra Vicky is such a beautiful and cheerful person. Here is a family that has so little, and yet she and Nancy were/are organizing a Navidad get-together for all the poor children to give them little toys/balls, chocolatada (hot chocolate) y paneton (kinda like fruit cake/bread that they all go crazy over at xmas time). I really admire her and really didn’t mind brushing off all my work. I also was given a “pepina/o/e?” haha i forget. But it’s a delicious melon/sweet tasting fruit that looks like a yellow, juicy apple/peach but is more like a gigantic grape. It was delicious J
The only downside to that day was that on Monday, when the father drove us to school, he was a little angry with me. Apparently he went to the house Sunday to take us for lunch at some point but only Jhoselyn and Gabo were there, because Jhosey wanted to sleep again after breakfast instead of come with Nancy and I, and Jhoselyn told him I went to play piano in el centro. He kept telling me that he does not like that (not being there for lunch) and that it’s unacceptable and everyone needs to have lunch together as a family and going on and yeah. It's suuuper important to him... but as if I should be given a talk to or as if it’s my fault that I was with Nancy, my host MOTHER and we didn’t know ahead of time that he was taking us for lunch? I didn’t retaliate or anything but that isn’t fair.
The AFS Reunion. What happened there?? We finally had our requested reunion, and every one of the AFS volunteers was there. The starting atmosphere felt sooo tense. Like a war battlefront, with neither side wanting to go first or be there or give in, even though nothing had been said yet. Okay. That’s a little exaggeration but. It was cold. Finally, props to Louise, she started in on everything we’ve had questions or concerns about and eventually it got flowing. However, although I think now each side understands the other one a LITTLE better, I don’t think the AFS students felt anything was accomplished or different by the end. We were told that the rules are less strict in other cities because their AFS volunteers don’t have the years and years of experience that ours do. Cool, we get the toughies. We’re still super upset that they aren’t letting Clemens change families, but I think they sort of saw how important it is. Trying not to get hopes up, but you never know. I also found out that I laugh when I’m nervous and dumbfounded and offended at a certain comment by a certain AFS volunteer who was making assumptions and putting words in our mouths. Anyways. I guess it’s better to show my surprise/frustration/anger/tears as laughter, because they thought I was laughing with them. I was just super nervous. But the whole reunion, minus a few moments, was very, very calm and well controlled. I was mostly the quiet, tense observer who was worried something would get heated up too far, but it never did. In that way, mission accomplished and message sent and received peacefully.
Then, after the group discussion, the volunteers asked to speak with me privately. *eeek!* hahaha but it was good. They just wanted to know what had happened with the family lately and how I was dealing and if I still wanted my own room. I’m thinking it was only because we’d all wanted a reunion and such but anyways, whatever the reason, they were all of a sudden suuuper willing and agreeable with the whole thing. I told them all of my reasons and I was surprised by the looks on their faces and by THEIR surprisement at what I’ve been dealing with. They said I need to speak up more when there’s a problem, and I can’t push it inside me just because I’m scared someone will get angry. So now they’re going to push for my own room and talk with Nancy a second time a little more seriously. Apparently there’s an office room or something I might be able to switch to. They told me that it seems very important that I get my own room, and I’m glad they understand. That also led to talking about eeeeverything and they were super helpful, more so than in the past. Maybe the reunion did accomplish something? But I felt a lot better after. I must laugh when I’m upset, because when I was explaining some things with tears in my eyes, I kept doing my stupid giggle thing. Hahaha anyways after that we pigged out on some sketchy-looking pepperoni pizza and dirty plates and went home :P
Saturday Quinceanos
On Saturday, after a quick, cold and lucky shower before the water was cut off again, I went to colegio and brought my violin. After our exams (I think they’re every month) at 11am a bunch of us had music class with the prof and a bunch of little kids banging bells and drums and stuff. Oh joy! Hahaha at first it was horrible because we played jingle bells for at least an hour for the xmas concert, but afterwards the wee ones left and I learned my first Peruvian violin tune!!! It was awesome, and it’s called ‘poco a poco’ (possibly the most Peruvian phrase ever). Then some of the slightly older kids and us had a jam and it was soooo freaking cool. It’s super simple but a bit crooked and yeah! There was a kid on one of those box drums, another on guitar, another on a beautiful folky sounding charanga (coolest little guitar/mandolin/ukulele instrument ever. Totally wanna buy one!!) and a girl using a pan-pipe flute thing that sounds SO AWESOME AND TRADITIONAL AND AWESOME. Yeeeea I used awesome twice. Then a little boy came and sang with us too. The song is so Peruvian, from a wino style or something. Supa cool. I wanna write down arrangements and stuff so that I never forget these songs! We played til around 1:30, and for once in colegio, I was smiling.
Then at . . . 5? Jhoselyn and I went to our second pro-ish football match in the stadium! Except this time it was TWICE AS PACKED. There was bastaaaaante gente everywhere and it was hectic, because it was Jose Galvez for the second time (home team I’m assuming) and “la U”, or Lima’s best university team. The game had suuuuch a faster pace. The time fleeeew away! Not like watching it on TV, bleh. And this time there was a goal! It obviously had to happen right after I put my camera away, from giving up trying to capture a sweet moment. So close to a peeeerfect shot! And it was in the last 4 minutes of the game, ending 1-0 for Lima.
Saturday night I went with Francheska, her bff Arlette (Mona’s host sister) and Mona to my first “quinceanos” or “sweet 15th” I guess you’d call it. It was definitely different! Everybody dresses UP UP UP in shiny silky dresses and high heels and tux. Except for me. I wore one of Fran’s simpler and darker vestidos that I chose so I wouldn’t draw a lot of attention hahaha being gringa is enough man. Too bad I was shoved into the tallest and most damaging high heels I’ve ever worn (not that I’ve worn many.) Definitely suffered, and had to take them off once in awhile for a break. It felt like I had broken all my toes and even when my shoes were off I couldn’t bend them. Holy crap hahaha but it hurt less to dance than to walk! So that’s what we did. It was soooo fun. I felt more relaxed hanging out with Mona and Fran’s 15yr old friends and the two of us just went silly making up super “creative” dance moves like wheels on the bus and brushing our hair and a bunch of stuff. I never dance like that with Jhoselyn or her friends! It was perfect, and we got an equal amount of funny looks as we did friendly laughs that led to others trying out our stupid moves too hahaha. Probably saw how much fun we were having NOT DOING THAT STUPID GRINDING that everyone does here. :P Oh yeah, to describe the quince hahaha. It was in a locale cerca de Plaza M, and was super fancy and formal. I had to giggle at the two painted gold men standing in the door though hehe, which was by formal list and invitation only :O. There were posed professional photos of Wendy, the bday girl, all over, and prof camera men who filmed the dancing and ceremonies and all this crazy stuff! She was part of choreographed dances with paid dancers that everyone watched and there was delicious food and a DJ and lights and holy vacan! There was an equal number of adults and kids and I think if someone had only described it to me before, I would have laughed or made fun of how big n fancy of a deal it is, but after being here in Peru and experiencing it, I realized that it really is an amazing, respectful celebration of the day they consider a girl to be a woman. Kinda cool, but I wouldn’t want it for myself. Too shy. At every 15th, the girl has a dance with her father and a dance with a charasomething (a guy friend/cousin/whatever) and it’s all filmed and hoooly what a lot of work! We limped home at 4am.
Fridayyyyyyyy
After actually studying for and writing my colegio exams (there’s a first for everything! ;D) I went to the cathedral in Plaza M at 4 and waited around to find out that the reason I’ve never encountered the music guy is because it starts at 4 THIRTY Peruvian time. Which means 5 or 5:15. And I’ve never waited past 4:45. This time some other kids from the choir showed up but apparently the prof was teaching in the colegio until 6 so I just gave them Nancy’s Nextel number and wrote it on the whiteboard so that he could call me and better communicate when he wants me to come and what days it is and how to contact the two students he wants me to teach and such. He’s the music director in Trujillo, so he’s not always in Chimbote or something. Anyways, I say anyways a lot.
There it is! Thursday
On Thursday I was invited to el centro to take part in Chimbote’s surprisingly large children’s violin orchestra! I was suuper surprised by the amount of kids and preteens toting around violins. There was even 2 cello players and a group of viola-ists. I was put into the more advanced group but still disappointed with the difficulty of playing. But that was before I found out that although in Book 1, these kids/preteens had mostly only been playing for 6 months-1 year! And they could read music and although only just learning shifting to 3rd, had beautiful tone, which has always been more important to me than notes and technicality. I also found out that, like Whitehorse, they have no permanent violin teaching residents, and so once a week teachers come 2 hrs from Trujillo every thurs and sat to teach, but it’s really expensive to pay them to come and travel and everything. SO, the woman in charge came up to me after our rehearsal and asked that I come every week to help teach the other children, because they have limited teachers and it’s really expensive and I obviously won’t be challenged in the orchestra. Awesome!! So next week I’m going to bring my violin and I’m so excited to help teach the younger ones because I know EXACTLY what it’s like to be without teachers. (the ones from Trujillo had just returned after many months away in Germany). Aaw this is going to make me feel so good haha i’m so happy. It feels so great to be integrating myself more into the city and volunteering and keeping my music and learning Peruvian tunes and chyea!! And next week the prof is going to lend me a cello to play while I’m there!! I miss my baby so much! Hahaha
Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday
Writing backwards and catching up is hard and confusing and takes a lot of memorial effort and I’ve changed voices (1st person/present/past/wrong day/ whaaaatever) so many times already. I’m sure nothing super interesting happened but I remember helping Tonio & Jhoselyn with their uni project again and buying some of the sweetest, most delicious little hot buns EVER from Plaza Vea. The end.
